So it's Monday and my beta is Thursday and I'm not testing until then. Trust me, it's no evidence of my own self control- Al really doesn't want to test early. He doesn't want to risk days of being sad but still hoping- he just wants to know the answer and go from there. So it's particularly hard now because I know I'm already either pregnant or not and that a test would probably tell me. But I wait.
I don't know how to know if I feel pregnant or not because I've never had an HSG trigger or been on progesterone suppositories so everything I feel is new. I've never had a BFP so I have no point of comparison for anything. But, for what it is worth, I feel pregnant. It could totally be the progesterone but I'd still rather feel pregnant that not you know?
I feel nausceous and it's been getting worse and I feel just pinchy and weird in my abdomen. Not sure cramping is the best word but something weird. I'm exhausted. The symptom I'm most definitely most being a loser about is my breasts (and when it involves touching my own breasts like 100 times a day, it definitely means I'm crazy) because I NEVER get sore breasts at all with my period or anything. I am small so I just thought maybe I wouldn't get that symptom. But, after my trigger I had sore nipples and breasts for like 2-3 days so I made a mental note that hcg in my system causes sore breasts. Then they got better and now they are sore again. But probably not as sore as they were those two days. And this morning they didn't feel as sore. Then again, the real soreness could be associated with the sudden hormone change of a trigger vs gradual hormones building up... So what does that mean???
See, crazy. I am totally insane. And really really nervous. A post treatment BFN would be new and horrible. How do I survive the next 3 days when I know Thursday will either be the best day ever or lead to a complete sobbing breakdown?
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8 years ago
The last few days are so incredibly hard - I'm impressed you're waiting until the beta! That requires an amazing amount of control that I don't have...
ReplyDeleteThe progesterone and trigger screws up all kinds of symptom reading, so this is tough. But the cramping type sensations are really good, I think. I had those too, and got a BFP. Hoping this week goes super fast for you, and on Thursday, you get some amazing news!!!!
I have to hide the tests!! Hope you get some good news soon :)
ReplyDeleteWaiting is torturous, but it will be all worth it if the outcome is positive. Speaking from experience, the progesterone mimics pregnancy symptoms and it doesn't really seem fair that we have to take meds that makes us think we could be pregnant. I am of course hoping that you are! I am on my month off of treatment and just a couple of weeks ago I had a breakdown after finding out this IUI #2 was a bust and never think that I will be able to move on, but life always does. It's always on my mind, but I learn to laugh again. Best wishes for the next few days, but just keep thinking that you are. If you ever need to vent, you know that we are here for you...this is the best kind of supportive community because we're all in this together for the good and the bad! keep us posted!!!! I am crossing my fingers for you.
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